Impact Story Series – “It’s Okay to Admit You’re Not Okay”

Shared Anonymously

At our Centre, we know that grief can feel isolating, and sharing stories can help break that isolation. Our Impact Story Series gives space for members of our community to reflect on their grief journeys in their own words.

"Almost two years ago, I unexpectedly lost my best friend. There were so many unanswered questions. As I found out more about what happened, it made me feel angry, sad, and just... lost. No one expects to lose their best friend. A few months ago, when all of those emotions were coming up really strongly, I realized I needed to speak with someone who wasn’t close to me. Someone who had different tools and could help me navigate what I was feeling: the anger, the guilt, all of it.

That’s when I was referred to the Centre for Grief and Healing. I’ve been speaking with someone, and it’s honestly been so helpful. Just having an unbiased person and a listening ear has made a big difference.

Grief isn’t new to me. Back in 2011, I lost my grandma. That was very traumatic, and I didn’t handle it well. I was completely lost. She was my person, my biggest supporter. Losing her really affected me, and at the time, I didn’t talk about it. I was destructive and used unhealthy coping mechanisms.

But over the years, especially after going back to school in 2019, I started to gain tools to help me understand and process my feelings. I learned how important it is not to bury emotions, because if you do, it becomes like a ticking time bomb. You never know when everything’s going to come out. That education gave me a foundation to move through my most recent loss differently. This time, I allowed myself to feel everything, and I think that’s what helped me avoid spiraling again.

I was in a Community Service Worker program, and the environment was very supportive. We’d do regular check-ins to see how everyone was doing, and we were encouraged to be honest about where we were at. There was no judgment. We celebrated the good days and supported each other on the hard ones. It felt good to be in a space where saying “I’m not okay” was not only accepted, it was normal. That sense of community helped me realize I didn’t have to shut down every time things felt heavy.

When I first reached out for support recently, the first program I tried didn’t feel like the right fit. I didn’t feel a connection and didn’t feel comfortable. But then I was referred to the Centre, and speaking with one of the peer support workers made a huge difference. It’s been really good to talk with someone who’s also experienced grief. It reassured me that they actually understand, not just in theory, but because they’ve lived it too.

Looking back now, the biggest thing I’ve taken from this experience is knowing that I have a safe space and that I’m not alone. I think a lot of people assume support is taboo or that it’s not for them. But grief doesn’t come with instructions. There’s no right or wrong way to do it. And just knowing support like this exists can make a big difference. If more people knew they could access free grief support, I think fewer people would suffer in silence.

If there’s one thing I would want others to hear from my story, it’s this: It’s okay to admit you’re not okay. It’s okay to reach out."

We are deeply grateful to this community member for courageously sharing their experience. Stories like this remind us that reaching out for support can make a difference, and that it’s always okay to say, “I’m not okay.”

If you or someone you know is grieving, we’re here to listen and journey alongside you.

You are not alone.